As we step into Rosh Hashana, I’m feeling the pull to focus on small steps of growth—not just in the way I prepare for Yom Tov, but in how I show up as a person. There’s so much pressure to focus on the things we can buy, the meals, the decorations, or making things perfect, but truth be told, this time of year is about something deeper. It’s about tuning into the real message of the holiday and remembering that while we’re making our homes beautiful, we should be making sure ourselves and our relationships are beautiful too.
On Rosh Hashana, everything is brand new. We are not judged on who we were the year before, but who we are TODAY. It’s a literal fresh start, a clean break from whatever patterns or mistakes we’ve been stuck in.
This day is about looking forward, not being weighed down by the past.
It’s about recognising that we all have the power to hit reset, to dream about the kind of person we want to be, how we want our relationships to look, and to start moving in that direction. Slowly. Honestly. Beautifully.
I think this idea of new beginnings speaks to how we relate to ourselves and to the people we care about.
In relationships, it’s easy to fall into the same old habits, reacting the same way, feeling stuck in a cycle (something we’ve explored together as a community a few weeks ago.)
But just like Rosh Hashana asks us to look forward, we can do the same in our relationships.
We can let go of what’s been dragging us down, and instead, focus on where we want to go and how we can grow together. How do we do this?
In relationships, much like in life, this growth isn’t always about grand gestures or big changes. Often, it’s about tuning into the subtleties—the small shifts that bring us closer to each other, the bids for connection, the gentle touches on their arm, all deepen our connection.
It’s about attunement.
Attunement is not reading someone’s mind; it’s about learning to truly understand and respond to the needs and emotions of the person you love. It’s about being in sync with their heart, not through perfect knowledge, but through constant attention, curiosity, and presence.
It’s not about guessing or mind-reading, but about being present and connected in a new way each day. Each day, choose one thing to attune to. In yourself. And in your partner.
We grow closer not by predicting each other’s thoughts, but by truly listening, paying attention, asking questions, and being present.
We grow closer by learning, not by guessing.
Each moment is a chance to reconnect and set new intentions.
It’s a journey of tuning in, not figuring out.
So, as we enter this new year, I’m reminding myself that the King is here with me—and so am I.
I am here. I can show up for me. I can grow. I can learn what I need. How I am able to show up. What I need to be able to communicate that.
And I’ll keep showing up as I am—growing, learning, and becoming.
I know G-d would rather meet the real me, someone I am in tune with, who I am at my core, than someone I am missing.
AND I want to bring that same energy into my relationships, being more present, more attuned, and open to the growth and possibilities ahead.
The same way G-d isn’t looking for the perfect version of me, I’m not expecting the perfect version of myself or my spouse. We’re only looking for the real, genuine, beautiful, perfectly imperfect human that we are, who’s just trying and growing.
May this year bring deep connection, meaningful growth, and continued attunement to those we love. 🍎✨